Goners - RU1:2
The Goners series, Book 1
Jamie Simons and E.W. Scollon
Avon Camelot
Fiction, MG? Humor/Sci-Fi
**
Description
The planetoid Roma is the site of the most prestigious school in the Planetary Union: the Diplomatic Universal Headquarters. Here, the best and brightest train to be interplanetary diplomats from an early age. Four DUH students stumble upon a secret hidden in the caverns that riddle the planetoid, a secret which the PU has taken great pains to cover up. Long ago, a team of diplomats, carefully transformed to blend in with the locals, was sent to Earth, scattered throughout time and civilization, in an attempt to teach humans how to coexist peacefully. Something went terribly wrong, and they were stranded. Rather than admit that they made an error, the High Council eliminated all records of the so-called "Goners," relegating Earth to a footnote in the kids' Dead and Dying Planets 101 class. One of the chief scientists from the project didn't give up that easily, and, with the four kids, is determined to set things right.
Review
It's books like this that make me appreciate Applegate, Coville and the rest all the more. The big gimmick, I guess, is all the little word-gags, which the authors seem to think are so clever. DUH and PU I already introduced to you (here I'll pause while you once more laugh uproariously,) but there's also characters like Arms Akimbo, a four-armed girl from the planet Armagettem, the boy Rubidoux from the planet Douxwhop, and computer accessories like the Think-U-Bators and the WAT-man (please, try to contain your mirth!) Those are just the ones that spring to mind, and at least one of the writers is convinced that they're the height of humor. If you actually did find those examples humorous, then I suggest you try reading an entire book where you are expected to laugh whenever they're mentioned. Trust me, it gets old fast, and I didn't even crack a smile the first time they appeared. I suppose there's an age group and mindset that just loves this sort of brainless excuse of a story, and for them this book would be just fine. Looking past that, it's obvious that neither writer put an ounce of thought into creating any of their races, planets or names. I guess they figured if they threw in enough ridiculous words and references to tentacles, antennae, and slime, nobody would notice. Wrong! Books like this come across as condescending to their target audience, and anyone else who wanders into the line of fire.